Although it’s common knowledge that sex toys are a clitoris owner’s greatest friend, you may have heard a tidbit about how some guys feel about them. But are the sex gadgets of their spouses truly a menace to heterosexual guys? According to earlier studies, sex toy users also have better sexual functioning such as increased desire, greater lubrication, and a frequent occurrence of orgasms)and are more proactive when it comes to maintaining their sexual health.
But more importantly, why isn’t anyone discussing the huge number of couples that have had the most fulfilling sex lives ever since they included sex toys in their relationships and lives? Shall we jump right in, then? Cause we have a lot of real couples talking about their use of sex toys in their relationships, coming right up!
Are cis hetero men threatened by their partner’s use of sex toys?
We frequently see that men’s resistance to the idea of integrating sex toys into a relationship is the biggest obstacle. Users who feel stifled by a gadget and claim they can’t compete with a vibrator regularly write to us. We can understand the concern given that most women are unable to orgasm during vaginal intercourse on their own and may achieve climax far more reliably when using a sex toy.
Some sex therapists claim that a widespread worry among their male clients is the fear of being displaced by sex toys like vibrators and dildos. However, this story has been around since vibrators were first made generally accessible for purchase and promoted as marital aids.
But thankfully, current research indicates that a significant portion of that taboo has been eroding, since sex toys may really improve marriages and couples’ sex lives.
Stories of real couples & their first experience using a toy with their partner
We talked to our beloved Manzuri community about the first time people used sex toys with their partners in order to have a better understanding of how couples choose to include sex toys in their relationships.
Here are 6 people’s accounts of using sex toys for the first time during play with a partner/s:
Shriya (32), Hyderabad
It’s been wonderful using sex toys with my partner. Vibrators, cock rings, and other entertaining toys like handcuffs and harnesses are just a few of the alternatives available. We don’t always utilize them, but they bring excitement to our sexual lives. I initially tried it when I first started dating my present partner. He not only suggested it but also bought me a vibrating wand and showed me how to use it. This quickly evolved into using toys while having sex.
No matter how wonderful the sex is, I find it challenging to get to climax frequently, especially while touching my clitoral region. Vibrators take some of the strain off my partner to induce orgasms, which I prefer. He never stops trying to make me happy, and his passion is wonderful. They can be a bit challenging to include during sex, depending on the posture and the object. My preferred type of cock ring is those with a vibrating clit. You aren’t required to handle them, and they don’t get in the way, making them really simple. Additionally, the stimulation on the clit comes and goes rather than being steady. The orgasm that follows is f*&#@ing amazing.
Amala (22), Kerala
The first time I used a vibrating strap-on dildo to peg my boyfriend while wearing the harness, and he wanted to sit on top of me. Using sex toys during sex can be fun and demanding. My lover and I use sex toys in almost every position, but at first, I was too shy to even tell him that I wanted him to enter me both anally and vaginally while vibrating my clitoris with a toy. (Just so you know, we did it.) We definitely did it again and again since it was so fantastic. In both situations, we required the other person’s support while we were feeling vulnerable since we were both a bit apprehensive about the activity we wanted to attempt.
For us, using sex toys during play is about enjoyment and connection. If you have a vagina, you can only imagine how much fun it would be to engage in anal and vaginal intercourse simultaneously while receiving vibratory clitoral stimulation. Although I can’t speak for my partner, I do know that his orgasms are stronger following intense prostate stimulation. This equality is a crucial aspect of our experience, and I adore that I was the first lady to ever peg him. Unexpectedly, I suppose we’ve emerged as advocates for anal equality.
Nithin (36), Mumbai
The first time my girlfriend achieved an orgasm on her own was with the aid of a vibrator I had bought her as a gift. She also has endometriosis and severe yeast infections, so she occasionally switches from a blow job to utilizing a pocket pussy when she’s in agony. She enjoys using her vibrator, and she usually does it while I am watching her. Being a polyamorous person, I can attest to the positive responses I’ve received from all of my partners, particularly the women. For me, using toys is merely a way to liven up the situation. It merely makes sex different, not necessarily better, in my opinion.
Tshering (27), Bangalore
I’ve learned a lot about the sorts of stimulation I want when using various sex toys, sex furniture, and other BDSM-related things for the first time with my partner. Many of the toys we’ve tried out offer a degree of excitement that can’t be achieved without including sex toys. Sex devices can easily do functions that a human partner cannot due to biological restrictions.
I have a special fondness for a sonic vibrator that emits sonic pulses that are directed toward the clitoris. We frequently use this gadget in our bedroom routine, usually during foreplay but also during sex. I’ve learned through using this toy that clitoral stimulation is just something I personally really prefer and that it’s by far the simplest method for me to consistently experience an orgasm during sex. My spouse always grabs for a clit vibrator and takes me to completion if he reaches climax before I do.
I’ve grown to really enjoy including butt plugs in our sex sessions occasionally. I really like how they give me a sensation of fullness, especially in the evenings when I’m feeling really kinky. Since the first time we used it, my husband has developed a liking for anal devices as well (he has the advantage of having a prostate, which I assume makes it even more delightful for him). However, it required a lot of persuasion to get him to consider the idea.
Kavann (36), Pune
Society assumes that because I’m obese, I’ll be lazy and have little to no sex drive, but this couldn’t be further from the reality. I’ve been married for nearly four years, and throughout that time, my wife and I have enjoyed several different types of sex enhancement devices.
Toys may provide fresh excitement to your sexual routine as well as new levels of playfulness and inventiveness. In this home, we’re all advocates for good toys!
After being together for nearly two years and realizing that things were becoming a little regular, my wife recommended that we try using toys. Since then, we haven’t looked back! She cherished the possibility of extending and enhancing the duration of our sexual experiences through the use of sex toys.
The gameplay is what appeals to me. As parents, we sometimes fall victim to quick in-and-out intercourse. We deliberately take our sweet time and use toys to test one another’s boundaries. It’s a fantastic way to interact and communicate while also adding some playfulness to the bedroom.
Nehal (41), Kolkata
For a while now, I’ve used pleasure toys in the bedroom without giving them much attention. But my spouse has never expressed any reluctance about using sex toys when we are together, therefore I have been completely at ease discussing my want to try a toy while making love and discussing what works and doesn’t.
Since then, having fun introducing new toys into the bedroom has been wonderful. There are so many enjoyable, well-made toys available for couples nowadays. Shopping for toys that appear contemporary seems a lot more enjoyable than it probably used to be when there were fewer alternatives available.
The good news…
…is that you DON’T have to compete with a sex toy. This is true regardless of a person’s gender or sexual preferences. A sex toy won’t make your partner worthless. Sex toys are good to use when you want to spice up things with your spouse, in addition to being terrific for masturbation. The options are genuinely endless. You’ll look back and wonder why you didn’t begin playing with toys together much earlier.
Think beyond the box and don’t be scared to be a bit inventive!